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Martina – 31 en
Martina – 31
Hi Sex Academy, I’m Martina and I’m writing to you from Bologna, I bought a latex dildo on the internet, and I used it only a few times, because using it always causes me a great burning sensation, I would like to ask you if you think it’s my problem of latex intolerance or I have to use special precautions.
Hello good morning Martina, latex, jelly or vinyl sex toys are certainly the best sellers, but at the same time the cheapest, unfortunately some of these objects can be produced with poor rubber latex, thus creating problems of irritation use; very often when you open the packaging of a latex dildo, and you notice a strong smell of plastic material, it means that the object is made with poor and even toxic products, or it could even be old, in fact the latex sex toys they have a limited duration in time, because with use the surface can deteriorate. What I recommend is to use a condom on the dildo, so you can immediately understand if you have a problem of latex intolerance, if not, then I suggest you buy a new dildo, possibly of a good brand, and guaranteed over time; I also want to remind you that latex and jelly rubber dildos are not compatible with oil-based lubricants.
Giulia -Sex Academy
Daniela – 37 en
Daniela – 37
Good evening, my name is Daniela I am 37 years old and have been married to Gianni for 5 years, I have a problem that is ruining our relationship, we have a good sexual understanding, our sexual relationships are always very beautiful and enveloping, but I can never reach orgasm; the first few times I gave no weight and I started pretending so as not to ruin the agreement with Gianni, but years later things have not changed, on the contrary it seems to me that orgasm is something I will never be able to reach in my life, all this is becoming heartbreaking for our relationship and I would like to understand if this problem of mine is related to him, or if it is only mine. I have read about many girls who have the same problem and it is widespread, I would like to understand what to do, if sex therapy is needed, if there are any pharmacological remedies, I also read about the tantra that can solve this problem. I would like to receive information to understand what to do. Thanks Daniela.
Hi Daniela, thanks for writing and speaking freely about your problem. Unfortunately, anorgasmia is a very common sexual dysfunction in women, but also in men, certainly in small numbers. Anorgasmia, as the word itself says, is the inability to reach orgasm, so not to feel pleasure during a relationship, but simply not to reach the highest point of the sexual response which is orgasm. We in the Sex Academy always say that everyone is “Responsible for their own orgasm” and therefore the responsibility of their partner is very limited. From how you tell us it seems that you have trouble reaching orgasm forever, not only with your husband, but also alone with masturbation; if so, in this case we speak of Primary Anorgasmia, that is, always present, and not later than a particular event. The problems can be multiple and so also the solutions, this dysfunction is rarely organic in nature, but almost always psychological, due to a strict sexual education received, a trauma suffered, or simply the inability to let go, for fear of loss of control during sexual intercourse. There are many treatment therapies, Tantra as mentioned by you, it is one of the possible, perhaps the first that I would advise you to try, to become aware of your body, learn to relax with deep breathing and let yourself be abandoned in a tantric session can be an immediate solution to your problem. For any other questions you can contact us without any problem.
Giulia -Sex Academy
Federica – 34 en
Federica – 34
Hello to the whole Forum, I am writing to ask you for advice; for about a year I live with my boyfriend, and after a few months of living together our relationship has changed, unfortunately in negative. At home there is always a tension, and it also fights for small things; I have tried many times to talk to him and explain to him that this cannot go on and that all our dreams are fading away, even sex has been reduced to a minimum, a few times and above all without that passion that tied us for years. I asked him to be honest with me, if there was another woman in his life, but he keeps repeating that there is nothing and that everything is fine for him. I would like to try a couple therapy, but I wouldn’t know where to start and how to get him to help us before the relationship ends badly. I hope to get advice on what to do. Thanks again.
Good morning to you Federica, cohabitation is a demanding choice in a couple, and if managed incorrectly it can also lead to the breakup of the same. When it is decided to form a new family unit, different from the one of origin, it is necessary to reset the model and lifestyle adopted up to that time; choosing to share one’s life with another person means accepting and adapting to one’s way of doing and seeing things, having lived a life span following habits, consider that that way of life is the most correct, not admitting to yourself that there may be other possibilities and different ways of dealing with things, all this means that in an unconscious way one’s habits are imposed on the partner, who obviously does not understand these new rules, but ansi considers them an attack and imposing oneself to change one’s habits. We must always remember that women and men have a different way of communicating and facing life, thinking of changing a person is the mistake that everyone makes, in this case we should be more sincere with ourselves, select the really important things for us and discard the superfluous ones, which very often represent a cause for dispute; the work of change must be within us, only in this way can our partner respect us and automatically approach him during this phase of change. Verbal and non-verbal communication is the element on which you must begin to work seriously; couple therapy as in your case will help you a lot, you will learn to translate the language from masculine to feminine and vice versa, and to become aware that the path you have chosen to undertake is made of sacrifices and renunciations of the past, but can turn into a path much more satisfying and full of joys.
Giulia -Sex Academy
